Saturday, February 16, 2013

THE NAKED METHOD: So what if there's a potty in my living room.

Potty training. I loathe potty training. I was lucky with Gianna. She woke up one morning when she was 2.5 years old and asked if she could wear underwear like mommy. I said sure, went to Wal-Mart, bought her a 10 pack and she only wet them once! She LOVED being a “Big Girl Now.” Maelle on the other hand…hates her potty! She cries when I show her a pair of Little Mermaid underwear.

I don’t get it. How bad can the potty really be? I like to think that pee and poop in your pants would feel terrible. Not for my pumpkin pie girl. She loves it, and hates her potty. She screams, she bocks, she goes straight as a pin. We chase her around the house when we see “the poop face” and try and get her there in time. She screams at me “I CAN’T like pooping on my potty mommy!!!!!!!!!!”  And then I say “TOOOO BAD, cause you have to!”

Yes, I am aware this is a little on the dramatic side. I don't use a mean tone of voice with her at all. I actually use a very silly voice.  Maybe that's my problem? I know that supposedly toddlers decide on their own when they are ready to be potty trained but I don’t agree! I’m the mother; I want to make the decisions around here. This 2 year old is running my life! (Not really, still being a bit dramatic I guess)

A friend of mine started training her little girl when she was just over a year old. I thought she was insane. All I kept thinking was why would you even bother? They don’t have the mental capacity to understand potty-training at that age. The child was trained and off diapers by 14 months. UNREAL! Why can’t that be me?! This has saved her approximately $1309 in diapers. It’s not fair. Not fair AT ALL.

Maelle is 28 months old right now. She is apparently in the prime age range for potty training. We bought a potty about 9 months ago and placed it in our bathroom, upstairs.  I read somewhere to buy it in advance of the training just so she can get used to it. It has all the Disney Princesses on it. That's the only part she loves about it.

I have been reading all the literature on potty training that I can get my hands on. Books like “Elmo Loves His Potty” “Dora’s Little Brother and Sister Use the Potty” "Flush, Flush, Flush" ETC…I’m not learning much. No, but really, all jokes aside, everywhere that I look online says things like, wait for the child to be ready, be patient, blah blah blah. That’s no good for me right now. I just want it done already.

I had almost thrown in the towel a few weeks ago, and thought to myself, I wonder if they make Pull-Ups with Justin Beiber on them for when she is 14? I then decided to do one last DESPERATE Google search for answers on this whole potty crap (excuse the pun) and found this:

“My daughter is 27 mo & we are nowhere near potty trained. However, at the advice of an older friend, I moved the potty chair to the living room. That way, in order to watch her favorite shows, she has to sit on the potty during this time. So, for about 30 min here & there, she sits & if she goes, it familiarizes her with the sensation of peeing or pooing. I think it's helping, plus I don't have to ask her every 5 min about visiting the bathroom, which was driving ME crazy. I can imagine how it was turning her off to the potty.”

I liked it, so I tried it the other day. She wasn’t really into it. Since her Pull-Up was still on, she just "went" in it then came running and told me she "went" in it. Not in the potty. I mean, it was an improvement, because she was at least thinking about the potty!

Then, yesterday, something miraculous happened. I was browsing around the Internet and THIS caught my eye…THE NAKED METHOD!! 

Yes! The Naked Method! I started implementing it today. As I type, Little Miss is sitting on her potty (naked) watching some TV shows, reading a book, loving life. She has been naked for about 4 hours now, and has done 2 number 1's and 1 number 2! I KNOW, RIGHT? Amazing.

I haven’t even been frustrated with the process. I haven’t had to pester her to go on the potty at all. I have been doing my usual Saturday routines (cleaning, computing, guzzling coffee... like it’s my job)… and she is focused on her potty, naked, and loving life!

I would much rather clean up pee and poop for the next 3 days (the amount of time that this Naked Method takes to stick) than buy another pack of Pull-Ups! This better friggin work.

OK, I gotta run. I am being beckoned to look at something in the potty. I’m hoping it is more poop!

Who the hell have I become?


Kate & Maelle (aka “pee-princess” pumpkin-pie-girl)

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